Be a man do the right thing
hey.. why am i like in a fluster again? haha. u noe.. i rly dunno wat to do at the moment. the more i tried to press on with the idea.. somehow u like making me think otherwise. u r demoralising me. so is dis wat u wan? i dunno. think u oso dunno. u noe.. so it becomes hard for me to advance forward. i move one step closer, it makes me seem like its de wrong move. luckily, this is like a thinking period. haha. its not like a move means a move and tt it matters. if u dun understand see it like playing chess. u noe.. like not yet set my pieces. now is like a match.. or i've been in de game such tt i dun wan to lose. winning this game is impt to me. but first i've to find a way how to stop u from attacking, at the same time be able to defend myself. and manage to attack u. hahaa. of cos its not really comparable to a game of chess.
tell me wat can i do? rly feel like finding ppl to tok to. if u din realise, actually u hurt me much deeper jus now than tt dreadful day. honestly i dun feel good. i may not show but i noe i din like it. cmon, issit wrong to wan hope? no rite? so stop convincing me to give up. I dun wan!
ok.. lets not put trust on the line. how much truth can we bear? can we be totally transparent? being awfully honest? haha. well mayb becos im beginning to not understand. or do i say now i dun noe u well enough? dun say the fault is in u. its a tough qtn. it needs courage.
de onli thg now i need to let myself noe is it will take time. how long? months? years ? who noes. do u think i can bear this long? hahaa. i would say v hard. everyday is pain. unless i can find a way to reduce it. it wiill be there. mayb i should prepare myself. to prevent from not being able to stand up again. u dunno how serious this is. its a life changing experience. tt is shocking. wat can i do to distract myself?
can i resort to screaming? ARGGHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
would it be better if u jus chop this off?
or is there rly such thgs as Good Friends after?
can i say FUCK?